Before kids, I used to make dinner every single night. These were big meals too. I’d cook for myself and Luke, plus my parents, uncle, and grandfather who were living next door.
It was an activity I really enjoyed and pretty much ended with the birth of our oldest. In all these years since, I could not figure out why cooking became such a burden for me.
Just the thought of making a meal is mentally draining. It’s not like I’m having to cook for more people or more often. Yet my joy in cooking was gone.
In fact, my husband has observed more than once that I’m an angry cook now. I quickly get huffy and upset during the process.
Over the holiday weekend, my parents came to visit. Monday was their last day with us, and they took the kids out for a swim.
Our daughter was in desperate need of a nap, so Luke took her to our room to settle down.
I had meal planned a few days before. So I went into the kitchen and started getting dinner going. And I enjoyed doing it.
It was such a foreign feeling. I was bouncing around the kitchen, moving from task to task. I had a song playing in my head and a smile on my face.
And that’s when it hit me…
This was the first time I was cooking in a quiet house without any children around.
I love my children with every fiber of my being. But as an introvert, they definitely drain me more than I’d like.
Cooking became a prime example of that. For 7 years there has always been a noisy kitchen buddy.
Whether someone is hungry and upset, complaining about ingredients they are seeing, excited and making up songs about their favorite dish, or asking to “help” – there is constant noise.
Mama just needs some silence sometimes.
Coming to this revelation created a shift in my brain this week. While life went back to normal for Tuesday & Wednesday nights, I was in a better mood making dinner.
This means, I want to figure out a way to have at least 1-2 evenings a week where I can cook alone.
Maybe Mondays and Thursdays would be a nice balance to improve the whole meal time experience.
How does dinner prep look in your house?